Wow...Before it was like a cycle with him
He'd be here one minute then gone the next
I never knew what to expect...well...I didn't want to expect it
But this time...it's been different.
He's been sharing his heart and I'm learning to trust him
And...now my concern isn't for his actions
...It’s for hers
She's feeling him and
I'm not sure how to handle this
But I guess I'll be remiss if I ignore it
Like she doesn't exist
"She" ...now I'm talking to you
I went to the Lord for you
I let Him know how my heart hurt at
How you seemed to be confused and without a clue
Of the danger recklessly approaching you
...And then He reminded me
Just of how I used to be...
Now listen closely cuz this is what He told me...
Don’t awaken love until its good and ready …wait until it’s supposed to be
Cuz you'll end up bruised emotionally
And spiritually you're supposed to be pursuing God wholeheartedly
Not looking over your shoulder like, "Is this him? Is he coming after me?"
*sigh* Trust me...this is not a territorial battle
But I been in these trenches before
And please take heed to the Lord before you continue to open the door to your heart..
Please guard it …it’s like a garden
Beautiful and inviting but be aware of who or what your invite in
And make sure its set on the right things...
Things eternal and not solely on the yearns of this world
Cuz girl...they'll catch you
Chew you up, swallow, and then reject you
Leaving you reeking of bitterness and anger
When the whole time you could have been pleasingly fragrant and remained pure
In His love...the only one that's worth any pain
The only one we're all seeking to gain
Nothing else compares...so there
I said it, I got it off my chest…
I'll leave you with some encouragement and I'll let God handle the rest
Seek first His kingdom and all other things will be added
Hang that banner of love around your neck and don't take it for granted
Know that you're in my prayers and I don't take this lightly
Focus on your walk with Christ
And don't worry about whom that "he" might be...

                                                                                                                               
Song of Solomon 2:7 Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.

Proverbs 4:23 Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

Colossians 3:2 Set your mind on the things above, not on the things of earth & Deuteronomy 6:5 Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.

2 Corinthians 2:15-16 For we are to God the pleasing aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. To the one we are an aroma that brings death; to the other, an aroma that brings life. And who is equal to such a task?

Matthew 6:33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

Song of Solomon 2:4 He has taken me to the banquet hall, and his banner over me is love

♥

I am sitting Indian style just looking ahead of me. I have climbed this entire mountain. I have gotten so close to the very top., all I need to do is walk over to the other side. But I don't. Instead I just sit there. I can see the light shining inviting me to explore all that it has to offer. I think about how wonderful it must be over there. I don't know what to expect, but He's telling me He has my best interest in mind. He's reminding me how He traveled with me this whole way; even when I didn't want Him with me. He let me know that He is going to go over to the other side with me. "You don't need to worry love, I will never leave you," He says. "But I like this little spot I found. It's comfortable. I don't know if I can get over to the other side. My equipment may not be able to make it," was my response. He looks at me and reminds me that He's there to help. He wouldn't let anything bad happen to me. He loves me. His encouragement causes me to stand. OK I trust you I am going to make my way forward. "I believe you love me, and I know you will never leave me." I began to walk forward. As I come closer to the top of the mountain of life I am stopped at a cliff. Before me I can see the vast world of so much possibility and depth. Like an ocean horizon that has no end, it continues as my eyes search the expanse. I get closer to the edge and I look to see how high I am. So high. A fall would be forever from here. My life would be in pieces. I see what's before me but how can I get there? Once I'm there what am I supposed to do? How will I know where I am supposed to go? I liked my spot I think I'll just stay there; this is way too much to handle and navigate all alone. I am leaning further on the cliff as I look before me and I felt a gentle push on my back. I lose my footing and search frantically for my balance.

"I told you I will never leave you. I love you so much, just trust me."

"I am so afraid! I don't even know what I'm doing. Besides what is the point anymore my equipment isn't good enough. What can I add out there what can I do?"

I felt another push

"I have it planned. I will finish what I started in you. Put your faith in me; let my love and your love for me be what compels you to keep going. Don't worry about anything, but trust in me. In whatever you do, do it in Love for me."

"But God, I can't I just can't. I don't have what it takes."

I felt another push now I am on my toes leaning over the edge

"Do you love me"

"I love you"

"Do you trust me"

"I trust you God"

"Don't let your thoughts put boundaries on your life in me. I see you for who you are and I know who I have called you to be. You are lacking nothing and in me you can do all things. I have given you new life and I renewed your strength. I will stay with you and we will grow closer to each other. I have been with you this far. There is no fear. Listen, love me and let me love you, seek my face, fill yourself with my word, come with me where ever I go. Keep your faith. Believe these things I tell you. I love you so much."

"I love you, too." Hesitant with tears welling up. "God" I sigh in between heavier breaths. "I need you closer I want to believe but I need to get pass these insecurities and my uncertainty. Help my belief God. I want to live for you alone. Leaning further now. Love me God, teach me, lead me....God I need you to push me."